Want a slice of MasterChef Julie Goodwin

'Everyone wants a slice of the chef' was the title of yet another full page spread about MasterChef.

NO. Not everybody. Get your facts right. I certainly don't want anything to do with that sort of crap.

Even worse is that according to the Sunday paper Julie Goodwin has four publicists, a celebrity agent, a looming book deadline, a magazine column, frantic TV and radio appearances--and random strangers asking for advice. What the fuck is going on, she is a nobody for peat sake, before this show started she was a house wife and runs an I.T. business and at tops, a hobby cook.

How many chefs out there would be dying for a little help from the media to get ahead?
What about those who bust their balls day in day out for Michelin stared chefs just trying to break into the limelight?

Oh well I must admit that I would have loved some one to grab up myself years back just to help get ahead grab some publicity. But then I'm not MasterChef even though I have busted my balls for the last 20+ years cooking for the public, yes I guess some of the 4.9 million of those that reckon that Julie is the best thing since sliced bread, Fuck you. You are a bunch of people that probably think that you will win the next 90 million on the lotto, yeah right.

I don't understand how these producers come up with this stuff, it's just so fake.

Quote 'cooking schools are filling up with students, kitchen-supply shops selling out'. Fuck, where do you get that information? It's just a big joke, we will see in a few months time, how it is and in a few years, how it is. You are just trying to mask how bad it really is and trying to make out that it's easy and anybody can do it! FRO. Quote 'we had no idea the snowball effect it would have'

Julie Goodwin's cookbook, with the working title 'Our Family Table' will be published by Random House around April next year. Apparently that means Julie has seven weeks to compile, write and test 100 recipes. She said that they've lined up someone to help with the food testing, quote "but I'm not going to send someone a recipe if I haven't tested it myself" I wait with baited breath to see whats in this book, baked beans on toast or roast beef and Yorkshire pud, or battered fish 'n' chips. Oh well, I wont be wasting my money on it that's for sure. Just as bad as that bullshit '4 ingredients', a classic I saw on Martha Stewart, ginger tart was the title. It was ginger biscuits, condensed milk, and banana topped with whipped cream. What a crock of shit, that's ginger tart my ass ladies! Why don't you go and climb back under that rock you came from?

As for all you young starters out there, I hope that you don't expect us to wipe your backside after you crap yourself when the service gets going and the chef demands perfection, Julie won't be there to help. You better wake up to reality quick or you will get eaten by yet another fake dream.

Remember, chefs are not just TV stars, we cook for a profession, it's our life and not a one night stand. It's in our blood. You don't become a MasterChef just by winning a house wife cooking show and you won't become a master chef overnight, I and many others have been striving for perfection for years and still wouldn't dare give ourselves the title of a MasterChef.

Here you can read more about MasterChef Australia

Image credit :MasterChef photos

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MasterChef Australia

We all saw the final episode of MasterChef Australia right? Well, 4.9 million of you did. That's the biggest viewing number in an Australian non-sporting television event, and 4.9 million of you wasted your fucking time.

What the fuck is Julie Goodwin a Master Chef of exactly?

I tried to avoid the show when it was running, but unfortunately I did however see a few episodes, kind of like 'rubbernecking' at an accident, you know it's going to be awful, but you just can't help looking.

This show was a fucking joke. I thought the point of it all was to help showcase undiscovered amateur talent, to give a leg up to someone who wanted to be in the industry, not to find the best Australian home cook.

Julie runs an I.T. business in New South Wales and states that her favourite cuisine is 'Aussie'. Now she wants to open 'a little homestyle cafe on the coast, serving unpretentious food'. Well, lets all rush to the cafe for Australia's next taste sensation. I don't fucking think so.

In the competition, she failed badly, many times, she was an absolute fucking wreck in the kitchen during stressful periods and there's just no way she would ever make Chef material.

What is it that's so fucking trendy about chefs at the moment? Why is it that there's so many celebrity chefs out there, trying to turn the industry into some kind of fucking reality TV show? They're hyping it all up, getting people excited, getting them into the industry, and 2 months later, our new 'young guns' are gone, when they realised that it's really bloody hard work! It's insulting and degrading for qualified chefs.

I made a dessert special for service this evening, one on the comments passed was that it was 'better than MasterChef' Fuck Right Off! Now that they've seen how 'easy' it is on TV, we're going to have everyone giving us their two cents worth, I mean, if Julie can do it, we all can, right?

Here's the news, no you fucking can not! It's in the blood, it's something that can only be experienced after many, many years in the job. Once you get to 15 - 20 years, just maybe, if you're good enough, you may be lucky to be honoured as a true Master Chef. It's a title that should be bestowed upon you, from your peers.

Julie, you seem like a nice person, but you are not a Master Chef, so please, do us all a favour, stay the fuck away from our industry. Sell your book, have your 15 minutes, and go F.R.O back to I.T.

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