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BE WARNED, CHEF'S KITCHEN RANT CONTAINS EXPLICT LANGUAGE

"Read it if you Dare"

Revenge is a Dish Best Served Cold

Friday, October 7, 2011

You dirty fucking low life fucks. Fucking fuck you and fuck you again. I've fucking had it with so called 'Executive' fucking management and their fucking condescending, patronising attitudes. Arghhh.... I'm fucking raging off the dial tonight, can you tell?

Here's how it was. Department manager, lets call him Mr GH, calls the office and asks for my department manager, we'll call him Mr EC. Sorry Mr EC isn't in the office right now, can I take a message? Yes say Mr GH, can you get him to call me? Of course, I will inform him when I see him and leave a message on his message pad. Mr EC gets message and calls Mr GH, who is himself now unavailable and leaves a message.

Phone rings again in office, it's Mr GH looking for Mr EC. Sorry says I, he's just stepped out again, is there anything I can help you with? Keep in mind here that this initial conversation is a daily occurrence from many other people to the office of which I am currently answering the phone. So the question he wanted to ask my executive manager was a very simple one which I could organise for him myself, and I did so! Half an hour later, GH calls EC's office again..... Is EC there? NO HE'S FUCKING NOT, why the fuck do you think I'm answering his fucking phone you fucking fucktard! Actually, that's not what I said, but I should have. Bla bla bla etc etc can I help you? Yes maybe, can you organise two mobile gas stoves and gas bottles for them and deliver them to me? Yes, I can do that, when, this afternoon, yep I'll get right on it.

So I round up two vehicles for transport and someone to help me and go in search of said equipment. Half an hour later I have two mobile stoves and two bottles, but one of them is empty. I deliver them to the venue, inform GH of the situation, tell him I'll organise a refill and it will be ready for him to pick up in the morning. He said ok, no thank you, cheers or sweet fuck all, you fucking prick, fuck you.I then return to my duties, and I've now wasted an hour of my day doing this.

Phone rings again, this time Mrs Exec CS manager, bla bla bla etc etc, can I help you? Yes says Mrs CC, GH said you only brought one bottle, where's the other? I've explained that to him and he said ok. Right says CS, and have the stoves been checked? Not that I'm aware of but they should be working and why don't you just use the same bottle on both stoves to test them? Ohhhh, I don't know anything about stoves? What the fuck?

I'm back doing my own work and now the Executive General Manager comes in and says I only took the one bottle and I won't go to check them? Wait, has anyone actually asked me to do this? So far I've gone out of my way to do what I considered a favour, twice, and now I'm being attacked for it. So I try to state my case and GM shuts me down, I'm not interested he says, I just want it done. Fair call, I would have done the same thing. I said that I'm happy to help, I understand the situation and all people have to do is ask, also that which had been passed on to him was like Chinese fucking whispers.

So, I've now wasted two hours of my day, fucking around with gas, which I'm not qualified to do, carrying equipment in over laden, unsuitable vehicles and putting up with arrogant self centred megalomaniacal Executive managers who think because they have executive in their title automatically makes them more intelligent than me. Do not talk to me like I am an idiot. Talk to me the way you would like to be spoken back to.

I am a skilled professional, I am not your fucking little bitch and just because I have a cooks jacket on does not make me a retard. My uniform is worn with pride, but it does not limit my mental capacity, unlike GH and CS's badges with executive before their name.

I will have the last laugh here, trust me, I've got a fucking long memory for this kind of shit.

I still stand by, however, on a simple statement my Mother made when I was a young kid,

"Courtesy costs nothing."


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1 comments:

Hellraiser said...

Ranting Chef, you know me well enough to know that my bases are always covered and then covered again, these fuckers don't know what's coming to them. A very good Chef friend of mine always told me to have kitchen insurance policies in place, for exactly the reason as you just said, when my guns start blazing, there'll be no shots coming my way!


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